I write these reflections at the end of the month on what I’ve been up to in the studio as a way of sharing how I show up for my creativity. I find it’s when I take a breath and take stock, I can see how I’ve evolved and what I’ve accomplished. It’s in that spirit I share these notes.
I feel as though the theme of November was discussion—asking questions of my work, being in conversation with others, and then using writing to stage my thoughts.
The month was defined by the open studios event at both Yorkshire Artspace buildings (Exchange Place and Persistence Works). Thousands of visitors came by and studio holders opened up their studios to the public. I put up new theatre photos I’ve recently edited, resolved, and printed. Seeing them together on the wall has enabled me to see how the initial visual rules I gave myself to create the work, I don’t need to slavishly follow. I’m now at a point where I find interesting stories to tell in each theatre and I can be a little more intuitive about how I make my compositions. Also, maybe some of them don’t have the same title, they might evolve into different bodies. Seeing them all together though, gave me a renewed sense of ambition for that work—there’s more I want to say and do with that visual vocabulary.
The open studios though, are an introvert’s nightmare—many interesting conversations but the quantity makes it exhausting.
I felt a bit like I couldn’t see the wood for the trees with an idea of mine that I need to polish up into a proposal for a commission, so I invited a friend into my studio to chat with me and ask me pointed questions to freshen up my thinking. That really helped me to reconnect with what matters most about that idea.
I also had this strange new feeling. I developed a strong sense of having something important I wanted to write in an essay, so I pitched and was commissioned to write. It took me a week to pull down my original insights—it was hard, writing is hard—what you want to say is always out of reach, then you just have to extend yourself a little bit and grasp those hard-to-reach thoughts. In some senses, I can feel a little bit less like a real artist because I do have the desire to write—a limiting belief that I’m cheating on my art practice if I create anything else. But I allowed myself the grace, to do something even when I don’t understand the impulse: to be an artist writing a critical essay that is ostensibly beyond my research interests, or the research interests I’m known for. It might be better say that this is potentially an evolving direction and a broading out of my interests. It felt good. I feel as though I do want to weave writing essays into what I do, like, I think I have a few essays a year in me. What I’ve written hasn’t been edited or published yet so it’s a bit too soon to say more, but I’ve completed and turned in draft one.
In my mentoring, I’m also increasingly supporting artists to write critically and creatively and to think about how they can deepen their research by developing a writing practice. If you want support in expanding the ways you work and generating your own projects autonomously, I can help you with that, get in touch and we can see if I can support you.
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